Self Love

To All the Women Who Love Independence…

It can be confusing to know how to honor your divine feminine energy of letting a man be a provider while taking care of yourself with love and independence.

However, from my own experience and the experiences of the women in healthy and fulfilling relationships with love, independence is more about feeling good about yourself than about getting a man. It’s so important for women to be solely responsible for creating their dream lifestyle because when a man becomes a part of their life they’ll experience him loving her while she’s loving herself in the words of Eartha Kitt. The more you focus on creating a fun life outside of a man the more worthwhile men you’ll attract.

We hear it in songs and stories about love all the time about how a man fell over his feet trying to commit to a woman because she wanted him instead of needing him.  Men are used to women tapping their foot along to an imaginary timeline for marriage, babies, and a white picket fence. They’re not used to women saying ” I want to start my own business”, ” I want to get my PH. D” or ” I want to move to another country” Independence doesn’t always look like working two jobs, driving a Maybach, and staying in luxury hotels. It has more to do with the attitude one has about themselves. You can work at a burger joint and take the bus as long he knows you’re focused on elevating yourself and can survive on your own before you deal with bad behavior. 

A lot of women desire for a certain lifestyle and they wait on men to provide it for them. She desires to be flewed out but doesn’t have a passport. She wants to be taken shopping but doesn’t own one designer item she bought for herself. She likes to go out to eat but will decline an offer to try out a restaurant with a friend. 

Independence isn’t always about money. It’s about presence of mind and having your own opinions, values, beliefs and mindsets. If you know you like to go to acting class on Thursday and your man asks you if he should make plans, the independent woman goes to her acting class!

A deep part of manifestation is treating ourselves how we want to be treated in order to change the way things are.  It feels so much better being able to provide for yourself without waiting around for a man’s approval like helpless little girls. The more you’re able to personally invest and contribute to creating an individual that is whole and complete by building a life of your dreams the more high value men you will attract. Independence is sexy and attractive. It heightens his desire and passion for you and increases your attraction factor, and we all know a relationship doesn’t manifest without attraction!

Don’t wait on a man to bring into fruition the delicious and inspiring lifestyle you desire to create. Invest in becoming the best version of yourself and you will attract a loving relationship that will bring you a love you don’t have to depend on to make you complete. Shout out to all my independent mermaids out there!

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